Now, I know what you’re thinking, and I promise, there’s nothing wrong with me. I’m smart, have a great personality and I’m attractive. I can cook, I can clean, and I can be trusted to return children to their parents in the condition that they were given to me. The issue here isn’t that I can’t find a boyfriend; it’s that I’m not looking. And I’m not looking because I don’t believe in boyfriends.

Take a moment to collect yourself. Pick up your jaw, relax your eyebrows and listen.

I know that in the Western world, it’s peculiar for young people not to have at least four or five serious relationships under their belt before marriage. I’m often gawked at when I reveal my singular lifestyle to others: “How are you ever gonna get MARRIED if you’ve never had a boyfriend?” I’ve had guys ask me if I’m a lesbian because of my disinterest in them. Yes, I want to be somebody’s wife one day, and no, I do not hate men, but has anybody ever sat down and thought about this “serious relationship” thing?

Basically, you meet a guy that you like, you go on a couple dates with him, maybe you sleep with him, then he becomes your boyfriend. I’m not positive about the exact order of events, but you understand what I mean. You start cooking for him, cleaning up his apartment, spending the night at his place, and whatever other benefits come along with being in a committed relationship. Ideally, you both cut off all contact with previous partners and refuse the affections of all suitors. You are essentially his wife.

Except for the fact that you are not his wife.

Your boyfriend is getting all the benefits of marriage: exclusivity, sex (usually unprotected, eek!) constant companionship and a hot plate upon his return from work. If you meet another nice young man who wants to court you, you have to pass. He may, in fact, be the man you are supposed to be with. You’ll never know. Eventually, this relationship will end, for whatever reason. And you’re supposed to do this over and over throughout your teens and twenties until one of these boyfriends proposes.

Here is where I feel like we got the game twisted: By the time marriage rolls around, I’ll have more baggage than RHOA’s Marlo Hampton did in South Africa. No, I don’t believe in boyfriends. I believe in dating. Meeting a nice guy and going out on a few dates or having great conversation and getting to know each other as friends. Me going back to my place at the end of the night, him going back to his. Meeting another nice guy and going out on a few more dates. I believe in men courting women, and when you’re a good woman, I believe that a good man will recognize that you are not girlfriend material– you’re wife material.

ZARA Tulip Dress $79.90, zara.com

JEFFREY CAMPBELL “Str8up” sandal  $154.95, solestruck.com

HOBO “Belinda” clutch $110, zappos.com

Since the event takes place in sunny Indio, California, it’s the perfect excuse to pull out those summery pieces you’ve been eyeing and dying to throw on. Also, be sure to dress comfortably, as Coachella has a history of its audiences camping out (yes, in tents) for the performances– definitely not the weekend to be styling and profiling in your new Christian Louboutin stilettos. As always, we have a couple fly ‘fit ideas for the music-loving Vixen who doesn’t care to spend an arm and a leg. Check it out!

Adapt “All Day” Tank, $34, karmaloop.com

7 FOR ALL MANKIND Cropped Skinnies, $169, djpremium.com

KEDS Champion Solids, $40, zappos.com

REVERSE “The Bandage Dress”, $80, karmaloop.com

DOLCE VITA “Dixy” Sandal, $79, dolcevita.com
OASIS Leaf Print Jumpsuit, $20, oasis.com

STEVE MADDEN “Wimzikul” Wedges, $109.95, stevemadden.com
NASTY GAL “Estelle” Blouse, $58, shopnastygal.com

SHOP KLASSIQ Tribal Print Shorts, $38, shopklassiq.com

STEVE MADDEN “Achilees” Sandal, $69, macys.com

April is here and that means Easter Sunday is on its way! If you’re one of the millions of people who only make a church appearance on religious holidays, such as Christmas or Palm Sunday, it may be difficult to decipher what is appropriate for the house of God. Of course, Easter Sunday outfit expectations vary amongst denominations; some churches adopt a “come as you are” attitude while others are super strict (I’ve heard of rules like “No sleeveless tops for women”).

Whatever you decide to wear, remember that church is not the place for a fashion show. And please, don’t show up in your favorite bodycon dress!

Get some fab Easter outfit ideas below…

H&M Dress $20, hm.com

MICHAEL KORS Watch, $250, macys.com

ZIGI SOHO “Gala” Sandal, $80, dsw.com

CENTRAL PARK WEST “Willow Lodge” Crop Blazer, $151, revolveclothing.com

VICTORIA’S SECRET “The Essential” Tank, $25, victoriassecret.com

ZARA Printed Trousers, $80, zara.com

BOUTIQUE 9 “Berthe” Sandal, $120, macys.com

NASTY GAL “Cross Over” Ring, $12, shopnastygal.com

TOPSHOP Lace Peplum Top, $52, topshop.com

ASOS “Umbrella” Skirt, $72, asos.com

STEVE MADDEN “Dynemite”, $70, stevemadden.com

BETSEY JOHNSON “Tea Party” Wristlet, $118, betseyjohnson.com

Get Beyoncé’s look (for much, much less) below!

NASTY GAL “On Point” Necklace, $20, shopnastygal.com

TAHARI by ASL PETITE “MJ Felix” Dress, $134, zappos.com

CALVIN KLEIN “Perla” Sandal, $139, zappos.com

The Black man is undeniably the most imitated, mocked and feared person in America. Far too often, this fear leads him to become a victim of irrational acts of violent injustice. Take the murder of Sean Bell, for instance. Or Danroy Henry, a Pace University student athlete who was also shot and killed by a police officer. Now, seventeen year-old Trayvon Martin has joined this list.

Trayvon was pursued by his neighbor George Zimmerman as he walked to the store; something about the teenager had apparently aroused suspicion in the captain of the neighborhood watch in Sanford, Florida. Zimmerman called the authorities to report that Trayvon looked “real suspicious” and disregarded the operator’s instructions not to follow the teenager. A brawl ensued between an unarmed Trayvon and Zimmerman, who was carrying a 9mm handgun. During this struggle, Trayvon Martin was shot and killed. To add insult to injury, George Zimmerman has not been charged with a crime or even taken into custody.

At the risk of sounding like an angry Black woman, I want to go ahead and say that I am infuriated by this whole story. What gives anybody the right to hunt down an innocent person? And what gives them the right to then draw their weapon and fire? What message does that send to our young Black men? Your life is so worthless that we will allow you to be shot down in the street like a dog, and your murderer will walk away from his crime unpunished. Actually, let me correct myself, because people go to jail for killing dogs.

There is a great population of Black men who are extremely successful, and I’m not discounting them. But scenes like the one that took place in Sanford on February 27 occur far too often. Once is one time too many, and these modern-day lynchings are crushing and humiliating not only for the families of these victims, but for people of color all over our country and even our world. We simply cannot afford to continue to shake our heads and go on with our lives as if we are not affected. Trayvon Martin could very well be any one of us.

Click this link to sign the petition for George Zimmerman’s arrest!

Get the look online at bebe.com, but hurry! The silk Belted Trapeze Shirt Dress is selling out rather quickly!

Be sure to check out the links below to steal Stacey’s springtime swag.

BEBE Belted Trapeze Shirt Dress, $129, bebe.com

STEVEN “Alexxi” Pump, $159, zappos.com

COLE HAAN “Hayden Charlotte” Satchel, $263, zappos.com

H&M sunglasses, $6, hm.com

Hey Vixens! I don’t know about you guys, but this mild, spring-like weather we’ve got going on in the Big Apple right now has me super excited to get all glammed up and step out this weekend. And speaking of getting glam, the lovely Estelle looked positively radiant earlier this week at her Vegas performance in Pure nightclub! That red lip, the yummy sequined shorts, those high highs? It’s all very sexy and simple. I get into this performance look because it’s totally wearable and not costume-y at all. Pair Estelle’s sequined shorts with a blazer to pull it all together for a night out.

Get the look below, Vixens!

AMERICAN APPAREL Short Sleeve Leotard, $28, americanapparel.com

FRENCH CONNECTION “Lucinda” Sequin Shorts, $127, bloomingdales.com

STUART WEITZMAN “Highline Swoon Row” Boots, $297, zappos.com

COVERGIRL LIP PERFECTION “Hot Passion” Lipstick, $7, drugstore.com

Well, ladies, recently I stumbled upon a picture of Rita Ora out in London wearing a pair of Christian Louboutin ”Intern” loafers… And I became obsessed. I am in love with these loafers and need them in my life with ALL intentional haste. But since I can think of nothing else, I have built three different looks around these fabulous flats!

See each look below…

TRIPP NYC “The Moto Jacket,” $122, karmaloop.com

WHISTLES “Milla Jesery Dress,” $170, asos.com

Christian Louboutin Loafers

LA VASHTI White Tuxedo Blazer, $100, lavashti.com

GAP PURE BODY Tank $14.95, gap.com

FOREVER 21 Pleat Front Trousers, $20, forever21.com

URBAN RENEWAL French Combat Jacket, $59, urbanoutfitters.com

AKIRA Military Style Open Blouse, $35, shopakira.com

SHOP KLASSIQ Black Acid Wash Skinnies, $32, shopklassiq.com