We All Have That ONE Friend…

Posted by on Jul 3, 2012

2. … Who prefers to wear yo sh*t.

It all starts when she first suggests getting ready at your house. You know? Because it’s “closer to the venue,” or so she says. What’s supposed to be a brief “run up, change, and take a shot before the party” pit stop quite quickly morphs into a tour of your closet and dresser drawers. Against your will, of course.

Soon enough, she’s “ooh”ing and “ahh”ing at all your prized wardrobe possessions, especially the ones with the tags still very much intact. You’re saving those pieces for a special occasion, but what’s more special than a homegirl in need, she assumes. “Ooooh, girl, can I wear your ______? It matches better than mine! I swear I’ll give it right back.” Chile, please. Been there. Heard that. Never saw it again.

You see, she’s a slick one. She always conveniently forgets to give it back at the end of the night, or even better, hits you with the “Lemme wash it for you first.” So kind and considerate, that friend is. *rolls eyes* But don’t you dare let her hold on to it for too long, because soon enough, you won’t even want it back. And that’s the goal of her whole evil scheme. After all, she’ll Instagram, Twitpic, and Facebook about five pictures in the garment, so the whole world now thinks it’s hers. And – oops! – there’s a run in the hem. How convenient.

(Continue reading at Clutch…)

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