Become a DIYer.
When I stopped going to the salon, I was at a loss for how I would do my hair. Thank goodness for for BlackHairMedia and their hair care forum. I religiously stalked the forums on hair tips, advice on going natural and installing my own weave. There is a wealth of information and for those brave ladies, you can be a pro at doing your own hair.
Find a more Holistic Salon.
Sometimes its them, not you. All salons are not created equal and if your salon is causing a hair-raising situation then you should take your tresses elsewhere. Your girlfriend with the great hair probably goes to a great salon. Seek out advice from other stylist and even look online for reviews. BlackSalonFinder is a great resource to find a local shop.
What is your relationship like with your salon? Hair-raising or Holistic?